Five Weeks Post-Op and Resuming Treatment

I am five weeks post-op today and recovery has finally been going steadily well. I'm mainly still struggling with stairs, bending and reaching, and longer periods of being out of bed, but am continually making progress. I haven't started driving again yet either, but feeling like I'm well on my way to trying soon. Since I seemed to be over the worst of recovery I recently started up treatment for one of my Lyme co-infections that's been causing me many neurological, cognitive, and neuropathy symptoms.

Since I have a fair bit of new people coming by my blog I'll explain that a co-infection is an additional bacteria that a tick transmits along with the Lyme. Ticks do not only carry strains of Lyme bacteria, most carry a variety of other bacteria and viruses which they can pass on to you simultaneously in one bite. Which is why many prefer the term MSIDS (Multiple Systemic Infectious Disease Syndrome) over Lyme disease as it better describes the complexity of this illness.

The treatment has been making me quite sick so it's been a hard week to push through. This kind of reaction to treatment is called a herxheimer reaction and is a sign it's working so I have been trying my hardest to remain positive and thankful despite the increase in pain and symptoms. Thank you to the willing friends and families from church who continue to drive me to and from my IV treatments, make us meals, and those who took care of Brandon for me everyday last week so I could just focus on treatment and rest!

This past Saturday was finally a day where my symptoms and pain let up a bit and I had a bit more energy. Sometimes these days just come out of nowhere, but this is the first one since surgery and resuming treatment. I'm hoping this means I'm beginning to make progress with this co-infection, but if not, I won't be any less grateful I experienced a better day!

Since I was feeling good I ventured out with my hubby for the first time since surgery (sans kids; they were at my parents for a sleepover:) Not wanting to overdo it with the first sliver of strength I got I reclined the seat way back and stayed in the van during two of the four stores we needed to go to. I also took my cane along. What's exciting for me is my peace with that. It's something worth celebrating. For far too long I have let the fear of judgement determine whether or not I do what I need to do to best take care of myself in public. Because I understand that I don't "look sick". Neither do I have a broken leg or old age to help others understand why I sometimes need to use a cane or walker and need other things that help make it easier on me to be out and about, so when I have to go out I push myself to appear as normal as possible - to my own detriment. And believe me, I have paid severely over and over. I'm working on this, mostly because it's kind of ridiculous and I'm tired of suffering more than I need to. So I just smiled at those who took obvious notice. I felt more steady and secure and conserved energy and because of that the rest of my day wasn't ruined. I still woke the next day with pretty tired and sore legs - an indication of how deconditioned I am. Which in hindsight makes me extra happy I used my cane! Praying that soon I will be able to slowly gain some much needed strength back.

Not all disabilities are visible. 

A couple weeks ago I passed the three year mark of my biggest health crash. I've been experiencing ongoing symptoms for five and a half years but it's been three years since the chronic debilitating pain began. Looking back there are many ways in which I've experienced healing thus far and we are thankful for the progress I've made over the course of these last three years. There remains areas my health has not yet improved and am still suffering daily from symptoms and pain, so we still have unanswered questions and things to look into and find the best treatment and/or management for. We continue to pray for healing and look to God for guidance in this.

It can be so difficult some days, particularly on the high pain days, to focus on how far I've come rather than the mountain still ahead of me. Which is why all the small things... the tangible signs of progress being made... are so important to celebrate. I won't overlook a single one! ✨ Because all the small things add up to big things, and focusing on those helps give me hope to keep pressing forward against all the odds, and the courage to keep facing the harder things in life.